New Polish Joke!!

This was actually invented by me the other day, in conjunction with one of the innumberable pointless, inane conversations that presently fill my time:

How do you play Polish Roulette?

Use an automatic!

Exquisite Juvenile Poetry, or a Californian's Despair

(Found hidden inside a shipboard clock aboard a certain maritime academy's training ship):

Bananas, monkeys,
Cookies and cream,
Watch is real,
It's not a dream.
Mayo, pineapples,
coffee and cheese,
I'm hella cold,
On account of the breeze.
Parrots, limes,
bitches and brew,
I'm writing poems,
'cause there's nothing to do.

I'm on a dolphin
Doin' flips and shit
The dolphin's splashin'
Gettin' everybody
all wet


Summer Cruise to-do list:

--Donkey show
--Drunk piggyback ride up gangway

Roses are red,
Criminals are bad,
You are my girlfriend,
And I think that's rad!

Roses are red,
Elbows are funny,
It's Valentine's Day,
And I love you, honey.

Roses are red,
The Irish have luck,
I wrote you this poem,
Now can we fuck?

Balls to four,
Is the best,
A special watch,
Much unlike the rest.
Nothing much to do,
No flags to put up.
I love this time,
I drink from the cup.
Watching the drunkies,
Get back to the ship,
Stand on the Quarterdeck,
And pack a lip.

Die Grausamkeit der Zeit

Anybody can see a pretty girl.

An artist can look at a pretty girl and see the old woman she will become.

A better artist can look at an old woman and see the pretty girl she used to be.

A great artist can look at an old woman, portray her exactly as she is...and force the viewer to see the pretty girl she used to be. . .more than that, he can make anyone with the sensitivity of an armadillo see that this lovely young girl is still alive, prisoned inside her ruined body. He can make you feel the quiet, endless tragedy that there was never a girl born who ever grew older than eighteen in her heart. . .no matter what the merciless hours have done.

--Robert A. Heinlein

Veering Left, Verily

Ich schäme mich...früher war ich ein echtes Recht-Flügel-Arschloch, doch ich war priviligiert und wusste nichts von der Ausbeutung. Der Untergang des "bösen Reiches" hat mich gefreut. Jetzt begreife ich, was für Chancen verlorengegangen sind, wie schrecklich die Herrschaft der Kapitalisten ist. Diese Lieder bewegen mich...