Exquisite Juvenile Poetry, or a Californian's Despair

(Found hidden inside a shipboard clock aboard a certain maritime academy's training ship):

Bananas, monkeys,
Cookies and cream,
Watch is real,
It's not a dream.
Mayo, pineapples,
coffee and cheese,
I'm hella cold,
On account of the breeze.
Parrots, limes,
bitches and brew,
I'm writing poems,
'cause there's nothing to do.

I'm on a dolphin
Doin' flips and shit
The dolphin's splashin'
Gettin' everybody
all wet


Summer Cruise to-do list:

--Donkey show
--Drunk piggyback ride up gangway

Roses are red,
Criminals are bad,
You are my girlfriend,
And I think that's rad!

Roses are red,
Elbows are funny,
It's Valentine's Day,
And I love you, honey.

Roses are red,
The Irish have luck,
I wrote you this poem,
Now can we fuck?

Balls to four,
Is the best,
A special watch,
Much unlike the rest.
Nothing much to do,
No flags to put up.
I love this time,
I drink from the cup.
Watching the drunkies,
Get back to the ship,
Stand on the Quarterdeck,
And pack a lip.